Intimacy is about feeling close to your partner, especially after the honeymoon/dating period. Lack of intimacy in a relationship is usually the main cause of breakups and divorce. There are many signs that your relationship is lacking intimacy or that one of you has some intimacy issues. When these issues arise they can quickly cause problems with one or both of you and make people feel unloved or unwanted. If these issues are not dealt with quickly then the relationship will decline and may lead to a breakup. There are many issues in this topic, some of which are included in the below points.
1) Communication breakdown – Communication is key to a good relationship. Most couples begin by having many things in common and talking often, be it face to face or by phone if apart. Talking and communicating problems is a key part to a good relationship and when this breaks down, it is often the start of many other problems to come. It’s important to keep the communication going, to tell each other how you’re feeling and understand each other.
2) Lack of sex and physical contact – If you are having sex much less frequently than before, this could also be a sure sign that one or both of you are dealing with some sort of intimacy issues. It isn’t just sex either but lack of other physical contact such as kissing and hugging. This could also be a sign of cheating and unfaithfulness which is unfortunately another situation than can occur due to intimacy issues.
3) You let your partner down a lot – Do you avoid your partner’s phone calls, or even ignore them deliberately, do you not answer texts for hours? Thus making them worry. Do you have a history of being unavailable or disappearing when your partner needs you the most? This is all about being there for your partner and if any of the above apply to you then it’s likely you have issues. Feeling let down constantly is a sure sign of a bad relationship.
4) Relationships don’t last long – If you’re the type of person that flits from one relationship to another after just a few months, then this again could be a sure sign of intimacy issues. Yes we all love that the first few months of the honeymoon and butterflies phase but when that fades away, if you’re someone who then runs, then you have issues.
5) Hesitant to commit – Despite dating someone, even if you really like them, you keep the door open to meet others. In the early part of the relationship, you may still have hookups. You are very hesitant to announce that you are in a relationship and even refuse to take down dating profiles. You often have to be pressured into a commitment and then you are still thinking about dating others.
6) Finding faults – None of us are perfect but those with intimacy issues will look for reasons as to why their current partner is not right for them. They will use these reasons to create tension and distance and eventually push their partner away.
If you find yourself relating to any of these points or perhaps see it in your partner then there are ways to overcome these issues. Take a look at this page https://www.regain.us/advice/intimacy/common-intimacy-issues-and-how-to-deal-with-them/ which goes into more detail about intimacy issues.