Our Christmas

This Christmas was spent with the 4 of us at home. Although the kids loved it with lots of new toys and presents. I couldn’t help but feel alone. No family came to visit and 3 days on and still no one. Tho I appreciate some of them had plans, my mother certainly didn’t and chose other’s over her own daughter and grandkids. I haven’t seen my dad in 12 years but tried to make the effort via cards and txts but still notbing. I have been feeling so depressed and down and the tears just seem to roll. This has been ongoing for months since the break up but gets worse every day and especially so as its Christmas. I hate being so alone and Thursday/Friday brings new year but no plans or partying or family buffets for me just stuck in this prison with no one. 

I so wish there was some way out of this for me but I have be here for my kids. So I do my best to try get up each day and sit through the loneliness maybe hoping my family will come 

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6 Comments

  1. Kerry Smith
    December 28, 2015 / 17:54

    Keep your chin up lovely lady. I have suffered on and off with depression for 20 years and it can be debilitating although most people don’t even know i suffer with it. Christmas can be such a difficult time (I’ve had some pretty rough ones in the past) and I really admire you for sharing your troubles through here. Please feel free to email me if you need an ear.

    • December 28, 2015 / 18:02

      Its awful. People say I should be grateful I have my kids which I And its usually these people who are posting happy family pics on Facebook and so have no idea what it’s like to feel alone.
      I haven’t even seen a doctor or counsellor as I’m scared to ask for help

  2. Kerry Smith
    December 29, 2015 / 15:15

    Do go and see your doctor the longer you wait the worse it will be. Like i say here if you need me. Alternative therapies such as reiki can be really helpful too

    • December 29, 2015 / 22:02

      I worry they will take my kids away

      • Kerry Smith
        December 31, 2015 / 10:21

        Oh my gosh not at all. They are there to help. So many people suffer in silence. Unless your children are in danger which I’m sure they are not social services would never take them away. The doctor may be able to prescribe something to normalize the chemistry in your body or send you for some therapy. Depression is an illness like any other. All the women in my family have had it to some degree due to a chemical imbalance. I was very depressed after the birth of my twins but they were also the only things worth living for. My doctor was fabulous we talked things through and she prescribed a tablet to get me back on track. There is no shame in it and having a happier less anxious mummy can only be good for our children.
        I’m very worried about you. Please phone for a doctor’s appointment

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